Written By: Toni Graphia
Directed By: Allan Kroeker

(1) INT. GALACTICA – BRIG

[Tigh is interrogating Tyrol under a hot lamp]
Tigh: You’re sweating.
Tyrol: It’s hot in here.
Tigh: How long have you known Lieutenant Valerii was planning to assassinate Commander Adama?
Tyrol: I had no idea she was planning anything of the kind.
Tigh: You were frakkin’ her.
Tyrol: I ended that weeks ago, on your orders.
Tigh: You covered for her, you lied for her.
Tyrol: I admit I used bad judgment.
Tigh: You protected her at every turn.
Tyrol: Colonel, I had no idea she was a Cylon. (beat) I’d like to exercise my article 21 rights at this time.
Tigh: Oh, I’m sure you would. I guess you haven’t heard. Cylons don’t have rights.
Tyrol: Cylon? Wait a minute.
Tigh: You know what we do with Cylons, Chief?
Tyrol: I’m not a Cylon.
Tigh: Roslin came up with the execution method.
Tyrol: I’m Galen Tyrol!
Tigh: She put a Cylon out of the airlock.
Tyrol: My father was a priest! My mother was an oracle. I’ve served on battlestars since I was 18 years old. The Pegasus, Columbia, Atlantia, Galactica–
[Tigh punches him out of his seat]
Tigh: Don’t talk to me like you’re a soldier! You are not a soldier!
Tyrol: Uhh!
Tigh: The old man always had a soft spot for you. Let him decide what to do with you.
Tyrol: Colonel, you gotta believe me. I am not a Cylon. I’d never do anything to hurt Adama. I love the old man.
Tigh: That’s what your girlfriend said. Get him the hell out of here!

(2) INT. GALACTICA – BOOMER’S BRIG

[Tyrol is thrown in the same cell as Boomer]
Boomer: Chief? (crying) I thought you were on Kobol.
Tyrol: Don’t. Don’t…you…talk to me. Don’t come near me. Don’t touch me. If you do, I swear… I will kill you.

(3) INT. GALACTICA – HALLWAY
***** TYROL NOT IN THIS SCENE *****

Cally: They locked the Chief up with Boomer. Tigh thinks he’s a Cylon.
Baltar: I know. I’m gonna see the Colonel now. I think he wants me to find a way to clear the Chief. Or…
Cally: Or what? Throw him out the airlock like a piece of garbage? If Commander Adama were in charge, this would never happen.
Baltar: Yes, but he’s not in charge, is he?
Cally: No, but I’ve known the Chief for years. He’s no toaster.
Baltar: He was involved with Lieutenant Valerii, who most certainly is a toaster.
#6: That word is racist. I don’t like it.
Cally: Sure… he’s shown some bad judgment getting involved with her. But that doesn’t mean he’s a toaster. You’ve got to help him.
#6: Say something, Gaius. Tell her you won’t have racial epithets used in your presence.
Baltar: I’m very sorry. I was gonna tell the Colonel there’s nothing I can do. The Cylon detector I developed doesn’t work. Clearly.
Cally: No! You’ve got to help him.
#6: Your child’s gonna be half toaster. How does that make you feel?
Baltar: Nothing could make me happier. I just don’t know what I’d possibly say. Excuse me.
Cally: He helped you! He didn’t tell anyone what you did on Kobol. What you did to Crashdown.
Baltar: What I did to Crashdown saved your life. Are you blackmailing me?
Cally: Help the Chief to help yourself, Doctor.
#6: Yes, Doctor. That’s what you’re best at, isn’t it?

(4) INT. GALACTICA – CIC
***** TYROL NOT IN THIS SCENE *****

Dualla: Deck log.
Tigh: What the hell’s the matter with your Cylon detector, Doctor? You gave the assassin a pass.
Baltar: Yes, but that was a beta test, a preliminary. Clearly I hadn’t perfected my methodology, and she slipped through.
Dualla: Fuel report.
Tigh: So what the hell are you telling me here? That we are back to square one? That no one’s results are definitive? That we have no way of knowing who are the Cylons among us?
Baltar: No, I’m saying that since Valerii’s te– since the assassin’s test, I’ve developed a new set of protocols which should eliminate any errors–anomalies– that cropped up earlier–
Tigh: For gods’ sake–
Baltar: If you let me test the Chief’s blood, I might be able to tell once and for all if–
Tigh: No “if”–I want a definitive answer. No more of your weasely techno babble. He’s a Cylon or he’s not. So get down there and do something right for a change.
Baltar: I am the Vice-President. Legally speaking, if the President is incapacitated, shouldn’t I take over her duties–
Tigh: Legally speaking, I have declared martial law. That makes you nobody. So… unless you want to join Roslin in the brig, I suggest you get to work.
Baltar: It’s good to see you, Colonel.
#6: Aren’t you getting tired of the continual humiliation? The disrespect from mechanics and Colonels alike?
Baltar: What do you think?
#6: Maybe it’s time to do something about it.

(5) INT. GALACTICA – BRIG

Boomer: I guess you really must hate me. I don’t know if it makes any difference right now, but I’m really sorry you got pulled into this. You know, what we had–
Tyrol: Was nothing. Nothing. You’re a machine. I’m not.
Boomer: Well, whatever I am, I know how I felt.
Tyrol: Software doesn’t have feelings.
Boomer: I never meant to hurt you.
[Baltar enters the Brig]
Baltar: I’d like some privacy, please. I’ll be fine, thank you.
[Guards leave the room]
Baltar: And how are we this evening?
Tyrol: What do you want?
Baltar: I’m here to determine whether you’re a Cylon or not. Your arm, please.
Boomer: His test doesn’t work too well. I mean, he gave me the green light.
Baltar: The test works… just fine.
[He injects Tyrol with something under the guise of taking his blood. Tyrol passes out]
Boomer: Chief? Chief?
Baltar: I lied to you, Sharon. I covered up your true nature from the rest of the fleet for my own purposes.
Boomer: What did you do to him? He’s not breathing.
Baltar: No, he’s dying right now, Sharon. I can save him if you tell me how many Cylons there are left in the fleet.
Boomer: I don’t know, but I’m not getting a pulse.
Baltar: Yes, you do. Now, buried deep down in that thing you call a subconscious you know how many.
Boomer: I don’t know!
Baltar: He doesn’t have time for this, Sharon. His organs are shutting down. In ten seconds time, he’ll experience complete brain stem death. Now how many? Do you love him, Sharon? Only you can save him! Ten… nine… do you love him? Do you love him, Sharon?
Boomer: Eight! There are eight.
[He revives Tyrol]

(6) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK
***** TYROL NOT IN THIS SCENE *****

Jammer: You gonna help out here or what?
Cally: They’re putting the Chief in there, you know?
Jammer: I don’t care if they put a giant parakeet in here. Colonel says build a cell, we build a cell.
Cally: This isn’t right. He’s one of us.
Jammer: No, he’s one of them. He always was. We just never saw it.
Cally: No, he’s innocent. She tricked him.
Jammer: Wow, such loyalty. Were you frakking him too?
[Cally attacks him, but he quickly gains control]
Jammer: You want to get pissed at someone, you get pissed at Boomer. She’s the one who put the Chief in the cell here, not us.

(7) INT. GALACTICA – BRIG

[Tyrol is freed]
Tyrol: Thanks. Thanks, Doc. I appreciate it.
Baltar: Don’t thank me. Thank her.
Tyrol: Why, what does she have to do with it?
Baltar: Everything. Nothing. Love is a strange and wonderful thing, Chief. You’d be happy you experienced it at all. Even if it was with a machine.
Tyrol: What are they going to do to her?
Baltar: They’re setting up a new holding facility. There will be tests. Mental. Physical.
Tyrol: Like she’s some kind of lab rat?
Baltar: That’s the idea.

(8) INT. GALACTICA – HALLWAY

Boomer is being led in chains to her new holding area. Scores of crew members are shouting insults at her (Bitch! Traitor! Toaster! Traitor! back Stabber! Traitor! Traitor!) Cally comes out of the crowd to shoot Boomer in the stomach. Like Jack Ruby.

Tyrol: No, no, no. No, no, no no. No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. Hey, hey, hey. Sshhh, sshh.
Boomer: I love you, Chief.
[She dies in Tyrol’s arms]

Transcript: Sci Fi SadGeezers