Written By: Bradley Thompson & David Weddle
Directed By: Michael Nankin

(1) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

Tyrol: Viper 289, how are we feeling today?
[Tyrol starts inspecting a raptor for damage, and sees a lot of problems]
Tyrol: Oh, great.

(2) INT. GALACTICA – OFFICER’S MESS
***** TYROL NOT IN THIS SCENE *****

Duck: How could anyone fall in love with a toaster, though?
Starbuck: Same way I hear everyone was high-fiving our Sharon right before she put two in Adama’s chest. The bastards frak with your head.
Hotdog: Yeah. Just ask the Chief.

(3) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

[Tyrol continues his inspection. The scene is mixed with his memories of sensual moments with Boomer]
Tyrol: I knew it.
[He finds a serious problems and labels the viper as scrap]
Tyrol: I need a drink.

(4) INT. GALACTICA – TOOL ROOM

[Cally’s welcome back party, complete with pickel jar booze!]
[Applause]
Seelix: Tan, rested, ready. Look at you.
Cally: Rested, anyway. Nothing to do but eat and sleep in the can. Hey.
Jammer: “Unauthorized discharge of a firearm”? What a bogus charge.
Cally: I know.
Figurski: They should have given you a medal for popping that toaster.
Cally: Chief. I heard that you went to bat for me.
Tyrol: Forget it.
Cally: I want you to know-
Tyrol: Forget it. I need all the knuckledraggers I can get.

(5) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK (near and in a raptor)

Tyrol: Sharon flew 47 missions in this thing. Still couldn’t trap a landing worth a damn. Had to bend her undercarriage back into place after every landing.
Helo: Approaches made her nervous. She was afraid you’d be watching.
Tyrol: I usually was.

(6) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

Helo: Look, Chief. I never intended for Sharon and I to- you know, it just kind of evolved.
Tyrol: Just a couple lovesick kids, huh?
Helo: I know how she felt about you, okay? She loved you.
Tyrol: Did she fill you in on the rest of the plan? She and I were going to muster out at the end of our service. You know, then we would get married. Maybe WE would have children. I guess I’m just a big frakkin’ idiot, though, huh? Probably that goddamn toaster’s plan all along.
Helo: Don’t call her that.
Tyrol: Sucker some moron into giving her a kid. Hey, you know, but you know what? I should probably be grateful to you. Probably be grateful. You know why? Because that freak in her belly could have been mine.
[Helo pushes Tyrol down the raptor wing]
Helo: Hey, you okay? I’m sorry.
Tyrol: Son of a-
[Tyrol punches him. Helo tries to end the fighting]
Helo: That’s enough, Chief!
Tyrol: You don’t get to call it.
[They continue brawling]
Helo: Enough!
Tyrol: Come on, you damn toaster lover!
[Tyrol has Helo pinned on his back. He is about to slam his head in with a wrench, but comes to his senses]
Tyrol: I don’t even know why I’m mad at you. My Sharon’s dead. That thing in the brig, that isn’t Sharon.

(7) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

Apollo: Hey, Chief, where’s 289? I need her for drills today.
Tyrol: Ship’s grounded, sir.
Apollo: What? For how long?
Tyrol: Permanently. We’re salvaging what we can, but it’s gone.
Apollo: Damn it, I need that ship online.
Tyrol: What can I tell you, Captain? Engine mounts are shot. Cockpits seals are cracked. If it was a horse, I’d shoot it.
Seelix: Got something, Chief.
Apollo: Chief Come on, work with me here. I need your help.
Tyrol: What do want me to do, work my crew to death?
Apollo: No, just do your best. Nobody’s expecting any miracles.
Tyrol: Maybe that’s the problem.

(8) INT. GALACTICA – ENLISTED QUARTERS

Tyrol: (in his head) Frak it. Why not?

(9) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

[Tyrol starts assembling the frame for a new raptor]
Jammer: What’s going on, Chief?
Tyrol: All right, here’s the deal. WE are going to build a new fighter.
Jammer: What about the rest of the ships? I’m three days backlogged on repairs as is.
Tyrol: This is strictly an off-duty project. Nobody takes one minute away from regular maintenance and repairs. You got it? You don’t think we can do this?
Jammer: I wouldn’t even know how to begin.
Figurski: What else is new?
Jammer: Oh, screw you. Okay, he’s talking about fabricating a frame, avionics, life support. It’s frakkin’ impossible.
Tyrol: You know what, then? Forget you. I don’t need you.
Cally: Chief, wait. It’s not like that.
Tyrol: I said forget it. Get back to work. That’s an order.

(10) INT. GALACTICA – FIRING RANGE
***** TYROL NOT IN THIS SCENE *****

[Apollo, Starbuck and Hotdog are firing at target sheets with Boomer’s face as the head]
Starbuck: Someone’s a tad aggressive.
Apollo: Just shut up and shoot.
Starbuck: My gods, between you and Racetrack, it’s like– having a conversation is like walking through a minefield.
Apollo: And you’re the last person who should be lecturing me about manners.
Starbuck: From what I hear, you’ve also been riding Chief Tyrol pretty good.
Apollo: Press it. I just reminded him that I expect viper maintenance to take precedence over his hobby project.
[Oxygen levels starts to drop]
Starbuck: Nice! I’m surprised he didn’t take a swing at you.
Apollo: Come on, Starbuck. You don’t actually think that piece of junk’s gonna actually fly, do you?
Starbuck: (laughs) 50 cubits says he gets it in the air.
Apollo: Yeah? And who’s gonna fly it? It’s not gonna be me.
Hotdog: Don’t look at me.
Apollo: I wasn’t looking at you. What?
Starbuck: I’ll fly it. I’ll fly it.
Apollo: You?
Starbuck: Me.
Apollo: Why?
Starbuck: Because… while everyone else is standing around whining-
Apollo: We’re whining?
Starbuck: The Chief is doing something positive.
Apollo: I’m deeply moved. Really? Honestly, I am.
[Hotdog collapses]
Starbuck: (laughs)
Apollo: (laughter)
Starbuck: His lips are blue. You look like a blueberry.
Apollo: There’s no oxygen in here. There’s no oxygen in here. There’s no oxygen.
[Starbuck finds her guns and starts firing at the hatch window, and misses]
Starbuck: I’m empty.
[Apollo loads an explosive round and fires at the window. It explodes allowing air into the room]
Starbuck: Nice shot.

(11) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

[Tyrol trying to attach a heavy wing]
Tyrol: Oh come on. Come on. For fraks sakes. Son of a bitch. Gods damnit.
[Figurski approaches to help Tryol]
Tyrol: I got it; go back to work.
Figurski: It’s a two-man job, Chief. You want this wing up or not?
Tyrol: On three. one, two, three. Great, great. Hold it there.

(12) INT. GALACTICA – CIC
***** TYROL NOT IN THIS SCENE *****

Dualla: Sir? We’re continuing to experience power spikes and equipment failures across the ship.
Adama: Thank you.
Tigh: We’d better up our alert status and put our damage-control teams on stand-by.
Adama: Not yet. (beat) Have you seen this ship that the Chief is building?
Tigh: His imaginary fighter? I don’t need to see it to know it’s a waste of time.
Adama: The deck crew doesn’t seem to think so.
Tigh: We need to focus on the fleet we’ve got left, not get bogged down in some pipe dream. We should shut it down.
Adama: It may come to that. But this project, it’s giving them something. I’m not going to take that away… until I have to.

(13) INT. GALACTICA – ATHENA’S CELL
***** TYROL NOT IN THIS SCENE *****

Helo: Do you have actual memories of being with the Chief before the cylon attack?
Athena: Yeah. I’m sorry. You asked.
Helo: Do you still love him?
Athena: Helo. You’re the father of my child. You’re the first in my heart. And nothing is ever going to change that.

(14) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK
***** TYROL NOT IN THIS SCENE *****

Apollo: Well, I hate to say it, but you’ve got the cockpit too far back. You’re gonna run into cg problems when you maneuver.
Starbuck: We’re not going for maneuverability, Captain. We’re going for speed. Besides, you didn’t think this thing would fly anyway.
Apollo: Well, it sure as hell won’t with the cockpit rammed up its a– Dee?
Dualla: Hey.
Apollo: What are you doing here?
Dualla: Communications, I think. Chief’s great with the hydraulics, but this com system’s a mess.
Figurski: Ten hut.
Tigh: Had to see this with my own eyes. Won’t be long before we have the whole CIC down here. You working on this class project too, Apollo?
Apollo: No.
Tigh: It’s good to see someone has a little sense. Where’s the Chief, the tool room?
Starbuck: Ah, getting in some rack time, sir.

(15) INT. GALACTICA – TOOL ROOM

Tigh: What’s this, Chief?
Tyrol: I’m making solvent, sir, to clean engine parts.
Tigh: Solvent my ass. I know a still when I smell it. What the hell are you up to?
Tyrol: I need booze to trade for parts. I’m scrounging most of what I can from the fleet, but I need engines. I know I need Commander Adama’s permission to cannibalize one of the wrecks.
Tigh: Engines or not, we both know that piece of crap out there is never going to fly.
Tyrol: I gotta try, Colonel.
Tigh: What’s the point?
Tyrol: Because that ship, the work, that’s all I’ve got left. I don’t have that, I-
Tigh: I almost forgot. I promised the XO of the Baah Pakal I’d help him out.
Tyrol: Sir?
Tigh: He’s got some obsolete DDG-62 engines that’s taking up space on his flight deck. They’re probably crap, but I told him that I would have a crew in there to haul ’em out as soon as possible.
Tyrol: Glad to be of help, sir.
Tigh: Good.

(16) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

[Tyrol is having trouble connecting a wire in a tight place. Cally helps him]
Cally: There you go, Chief.
Tyrol: Nice to be small, huh? Ship’s got more than one engine. Get to it.
Starbuck: We are so damn close. There has got to be some extra metal lying around that we can use to skin this thing. Floorboards, extra bulkheads, something.
Tyrol: Most of it’s ticketed for viper repair.
Helo: Who says you need metal?

(17) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

[The blackbird is completed. It’s black and angular much like a stealth fighter]
Apollo: Carbon composite.
Starbuck: Good call, Helo.
Apollo: It’s going to be hard as hell to see on dradis, but the question is, will it fly?
Starbuck: Just watch me.

(18) INT. GALACTICA – LAUNCH BAY

Starbuck: Instruments… in the green. Fuel pressure… nominal.
Dualla: Apollo, Starbuck. Blackbird flight is cleared for launch.
Starbuck: Run-up.
Kelly: Maglock secure, initiate launch sequence.
Starbuck: Oh, don’t blow up on me, you bastard.
Kelly: You are clear for launch.
[The blackbird launches]
Dualla: Blackbird is away.

(19) SPACE

[Starbuck is having some difficulty keeping the blackbird flying straight. It looks like she’s showing off]
Apollo: Hey! Hey. Will you take it easy? Start slow. You’re testing the ship. It’s not about the pilot showing off.
Starbuck: I’m not showing off.
Apollo: Gods damn it, what is this? What are you trying to prove?
Starbuck: I’m not trying to prove anything. You’ve got to be kidding me. Whoo! Oh, lords. Okay. Let’s see what this baby can do. Yaa-ha-ha-ha!
[Starbuck gains control of the ship. She presses the throttle and dissappears]
Apollo: Starbuck, where are you? Starbuck, do you hear me? Starbuck! She’s gone. Galactica, Apollo, I’ve lost her. I’ve lost her.
Dualla: No dradis contact.
Apollo: Starbuck, Starbuck, where are you? Starbuck, come in. Starbuck, do you read? Kara, are you okay?
Starbuck: Of course you lost contact. It’s a damned stealth ship, remember?
[The blackbird appears directly in front of Apollo’s viper]
Apollo: Oh, you-
Starbuck: (laughs)

(20) INT. GALACTICA – HANGAR DECK

[Blackbird christening ceremony]
Figurski: Commander on deck.
Adama: As you were.
Roslin: Chief Tyrol? This is the blackbird?
Tyrol: Yes, ma’am. Madam President, this is an honor.
Roslin: No, the honor’s mine. It’s remarkable.
Tyrol: Just a ship, ma’am.
Roslin: Oh, you’re much too modest. After what we’ve been through, it would be very easy to give up, to lose hope. But not here. Not today. This is more than a ship, Chief. This is an act of faith. It is proof that despite all we’ve lost, we keep trying. And we will get through this, all of us, together. I promise.
[Meanwhile the crew are signing the engine to show that they helped build the blackbird]
Tyrol: Commander.
[Tyrol hands Adama a bottle of sparkling wine]
Tyrol: Uh, Madam President. This was supposed to be a surprise, but ahhh, well-
[Tyrol pulls a sheet revealing that the blackbird has been named “Laura”. Roslin is in tears]
Roslin: Thank you.
Adama: If you’ll do us the honors, Madam President.
Roslin: Of Course, Oh. Okay.
Tyrol: Whoa!
Roslin: (Laughter) Kidding.
Racetrack: Hell of an idea, using carbon composites.
[She shakes Helo’s hand. Other pilots and crew follow suit]
Duck: It was a good job.
Seelix: Nice work.
Roslin: That was lovely.
Adama: They wanted to do that for you.
Roslin: Thank you. None of this would have been possible if you hadn’t trusted the cylon.
Adama: I took your advice, met on common ground.
Roslin: What was that?
Adama: We both wanted to live.

(21) INT. GALACTICA – ATHENA’S CELL

The episode ends with Tyrol visiting Athena’s cell. The both pick up a phone to talk to one another. We don’t see/hear the conversation.

Transcript: Sci Fi SadGeezers